Sunday, November 28, 2010

Miracles and Thankfulness and How Great is Our God!

There are times in my life when it seems like God uses people, words, circumstances, songs, what have you, to get my attention and speak to my heart and that has been happening in the last few days.
The first thing was that I received a card in the mail from my Mom and on the front of the card it says "Every sunrise is proof that God is still in the miracle business". On the inside she wrote words of encouragement and love and reminded me that she is praying for me and hoping with me. It seems like whenever I am going through a hard time I never have to tell her. She just knows. And she prays for me. I am sure there is a lot in my life that hasn't happened or has happened or things I have been saved from and help that I have gotten that has all happened because she prays. I also believe that I will never know how many hours she has prayed for me. I do know though that I am so thankful that she IS praying and hoping and that she is such a huge source of support. Thank you Mom. Thank you for the reminder, for your words, for your prayers, for your love. Love you.
The second thing was reading a post by a young woman who is doing her DTS with YWAM in Mexico. Her post was titled "Turn that frown upside down". The whole post was so good and it was challenging. There was one sentence that jumped right off the page at me and the sentence was "I don't want to waste any more time complaining about the things that God has blessed me with". Ouch! It is so true though! How often do I let my longing to be a mommy and to hold my baby cloud my eyes and heart from seeing the many blessings I already have. Instead of living in the moment and being thankful and in awe of all that God has done I long and yearn and at times cry and get frustrated. May I not waste any more time! Instead of taking my blessings for granted and longing for more may I be so aware of this life I have and the privilege I have of living it! 
The third was a song that we sang in church this morning. We had communion in church today and it is always an emotional time for me. I love how we have been doing it there because the worship team leads us in worship and as we feel led we can individually go and take the emblems, spend time in private prayer and then partake as we feel led. It is a much more intimate time between us and the Lord, so very personal. One of the songs sung during that time is one of my favourite worship songs right now. The song is "How Great is Our God" by Chris Tomlin. It was just such a strong reminder to me today that no matter what is going on in my life my heart can still sing how great is our God! I am including the lyrics here for you to read and to remind you that He is worthy of our praise, His name is above all names and that no matter the circumstances our hearts can sing about His greatness. 
As I head into this next week with it's stresses and busyness, and knowing that I am still waiting to be a mommy, I am going to try and remember all God has shown me the last few days. May I live in the awareness that God is great, that He is still in the miracle business and may I remember to be thankful for all His amazing blessings.


How Great is Our God


The splendor of the King, clothed in majesty 
Let all the earth rejoice 
All the earth rejoice 

He wraps himself in Light, and darkness tries to hide 
And trembles at His voice 
Trembles at His voice 

How great is our God, sing with me 
How great is our God, and all will see 
How great, how great is our God 

Age to age He stands 
And time is in His hands 
Beginning and the end 
Beginning and the end 

The Godhead Three in One 
Father Spirit Son 
The Lion and the Lamb 
The Lion and the Lamb 

How great is our God, sing with me
How great is our God, and all will see
How great, how great is our God

Name above all names 
Worthy of all praise 
My heart will sing 
How great is our God 

Name above all names
Worthy of all praise
My heart will sing
How great is our God

How great is our God, sing with me 
How great is our God, and all will see 
How great, how great is our God 

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

8 Months and Counting

I emailed the adoption agency last week for an update on our status. In the last month we moved up to two more spots! We are now at #34 on the list. It is encouraging that we have moved a little but I will admit that the waiting is getting harder. There are so many days when it just feels like it is never going to happen and I have to remind myself that God knows what is going on and He knows best. I find myself more and more waiting for the phone to ring, looking to see if there are messages, hoping that we will hear something soon. For the first quite a few months I hardly even thought about the phone ringing or thinking it might be the agency when it did. I am not sure when that changed but I now find myself hoping the caller ID will show the agency number or that my cell phone will ring while I am at work. It's been a little harder lately for me to be positive about it but I am trying. 


I have gotten a new job and have been so very busy in the last month which is actually really good for me when it comes to all of this. I can't think about it as much or sit and feel sorry for myself. Instead my days are full and lately my evenings have been as well with church activities. I am so thankful for all of that. Not just thankful for the busyness but also thankful for the little community that is forming and that we are part of. It helps so much to have support even if it is mostly through prayer. It is so true that unless someone has been through the infertility/adoption experience they can't fully understand our hearts in it all but that doesn't mean that they can't still pray for us and just be there. The kids in the youth group want an update every so often and they are all so excited. We are excited that we will have a houseful of babysitters. :)


So yes, we have moved up the list. No, there is no other news. Yes, it is tough and I can't think about it too much or I just get all teary. Yes, I know God is good and He has a plan and His timing is perfect and to that I will and must cling. I am blessed beyond belief in the life I already have and I am more and more thankful every day that God's grace is truly sufficient and that in Him I can trust.


Please though, keep praying. Not just for our baby and that it will happen soon but also for Chad and I as our hearts long to love our baby and our arms ache to hold our baby and as we dream and hope and at times cry and get frustrated and feel discouraged. I keep thinking that it will be like it was when Chad and I finally got together....the waiting is so hard and feels like it is taking forever but when it finally happens the waiting will feel like it was a blink of an eye and we will be willing to do it again because it is so worth it.